LIFE’S A TRIP 

Birmingham, Alabama- The Pine Belt Pacers were well represented in the Mercedes Marathon this year as the club sent its travel team to Birmingham to watch the Olympic Trials on Saturday and compete in the marathon on Sunday.  President Jim Coll, Party Chairman/Race Director Keith Barrett, and Tony Mozingo left the Hub City Friday afternoon and were joined by Dr. John Pendergrass on Saturday.  With the exception of Pendergrass embarrassing the crew by scolding a volunteer at the registration desk when she said, “Good luck, Mr. Pendergrass”, registration was uneventful.

            “That’s Doctor Pendergrass to you, lady,” he admonished, and we were on our way.  After a brief reassurance to our embarrassed new president, we decided to let it go and not make a federal case out of it.

            On the trip over to Birmingham the day before, many critical issues were discussed, including the fact that there is a lot going on in the world and that life is a trip.  Barrett entertained Mozingo and rookie Coll, who was travelling with the Pacers for the first time, while Coll pressed Mozingo for inside information about the presidential campaign and the other president’s reelection plans.

            “It was an eye and mind-opening experience, I will say that…”, commented the newspaper editor later.  “No wonder Steve Ulery’s wife won’t let him go on trips with them without her…”

            The Olympic Trials were held on a windy, cold and overcast Saturday morning.  The Pacers set up camp at the 9.5/15/26 mile mark and watched as the country’s best marathoners passed by.  About 70 runners began the race, with the three slots on the U.S. team being awarded to the top three finishers.  At the end, there were no surprises since the race leader through twenty miles was caught and passed, making the last 10 kilometers a shoot-out among the pre-race favorites.  Watching the race was inspiring.  The city supported the event in great numbers in a very festive atmosphere.

            That night, the four enjoyed the IMAX theatre for “dinner and a movie” in conjunction with the marathon the next day.  The pasta wasn’t very good, so two of the Pacers ended up at Burger King trying to get a Whopper from a guy behind the counter on a cell phone late that night.  After being told that the marathoners didn’t mean to interrupt the call, the attendant simply replied,

            “It’s alright, man.  She’ll wait…  Say man, what’s that mean U.S. Duathlon Team on your jacket?”

            “Aw, it’s nothing really,” the courtly doctor replied.

            The evening passed after Pendergrass imposed a curfew on the other Pacers, banning them from the Irish joint across the parking lot. 

            “There really is a lot going on in the world, you know it?” Barrett stated upon finishing watching a NASCAR race on television later on around midnight.  “I mean, life’s a trip when you think about it…” 

            The runners enjoyed clearing skies and perfect temperatures for the marathon the next morning.  The course, designed by TrakShak owner and Olympic marathon trials participant Scott Strand, for some reason went over the mountain between Birmingham and I-459, causing at least one of the Pacers to lament that he had chosen to root for Strand the day before in the trials.

            By the halfway point of the marathon, Mozingo had stretched out to a lead of about thirty seconds on Coll and Barrett.  But by mile fifteen, the chasers had closed the gap and laughed at the former president as they passed him.

            “Say, I thought you were an Ironman,” Barrett laughed as he passed. 

            “I sure wish I could get my hands on that Strand fella,” Mozingo said as he pressed up a two-mile hill near mile marker 20.  But dejected emotionally, he was left in the dust of Coll and Barrett’s path, the aging Pendergrass more than a mile behind.

            Pendergrass, sporting a gold-trimmed Zoot outfit, gamely trudged along until another encounter at an aid station with the same volunteer from the registration desk.  After she refused to give him Powerade at the aid station, Pendergrass yelled; 

            “I’m fifty-nine lady, seriously.”

            “Yeah, and you’ll be sixty if you live long enough.  See ya at the finish,” she yelled back from the warm tent near the course. 

            “I wouldn’t count on it though.  You don’t look so good and you’ve still got another mile to get over this hill…”

            All four of the Pacers were proud of their times.  The marathon course was one of the most brutal on the circuit, and the runners were thankful to finish.

            Mozingo broke the elusive four-hour mark, while Coll and Barrett easily ran the final 15 kilometers at a steady pace and finished well ahead.  Their times allowed them to cool down and prepare for the Mardi Gras Marathon by using it as a training run of sorts.  Pendergrass cruised in with a smile sometime later, obviously pleased with his performance.

            “I can tell you, I won’t ever do this one again,” the beleaguered former war hero whispered to the lady at the finish line.

            “I already have a Mercedes anyway…”

            A chipper Keith Barrett laughed upon overhearing the comment by Pendergrass and said,

            “See, I told you.  Life really is a trip…” THE END